Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
The hotel had a helipad. Of course we had sex on it.
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
Randomize