Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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