Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
She looked at me and said "i like penises." and then passed out with her condom balloon animal in her hands.
he told her he was actually impressed that she had fucked more people in this house than the four dudes living in it.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
Randomize
