Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I still owe him the card with all the sperm paper cutouts falling out like glitter saying " sorry you can't hold your load. Better luck next time "
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
