No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I could fuck to npr.
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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