i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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