You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
