Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
where are my eyebrows?
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
Randomize
