shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Don't act like you're not jealous that I disappeared into the closet to blow my husband. Marriage = all the cock I want.
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
The way I kissed her was actually pretty charming and then it devolved to car sex
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
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