How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
My aunt just dropped me off at the bar, handed me $50 and told me she'd pick me up later if I needed her to. I should've gotten my license suspended a long ass time ago lol
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize