Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
Randomize
