We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
no no no no you can't just say your dirtiest secret is "i sat on goldfish by accident once" and just leave i have QUESTIONS
AT LEAST TELL ME IF THE GOLDFISH WAS STILL IN A BOWL??????????????
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
