so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
