just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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