if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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