I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Randomize
