I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
Let's play a little game called "Chill the Fuck Out" - you're our first contestant
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
