She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
I just had some guy offer to eat me out on my lunch break... I think single life is getting better everyday
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
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