Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
there are ass prints on the hood of my car.
Dude you were tripping so badly we put a pretend box around your head and you spoke silently for the rest of the night. I think pterodactyls were involved.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
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