My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
My third nipple is alarmingly under-appreciated.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
