Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
