Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I fucked my boyfriend 15 minutes before my pap test. My gyno probably thinks I hate her.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
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