Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
He drunk dialed T-Mobile at 3am and talked to them for 45 minutes and got his phone bill lowered from $80 to $60... Best drunk dial ever.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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