It's always exciting to touch a new boob.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Good thing I was dressed to impress in my "I went nuclear on my wings" shirt even the girls are making out and I'm still 7th wheeling it...
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
That dude you fucked three years ago just won Jeopardy
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
Randomize
