shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
