Don't you send me to vm
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
3pm strippers are depressing
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
I'm a wonderful, drunk angel of hydration and sometimes absinthe.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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