Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
Pretty sure this ice cream truck is following me.
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
