Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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