So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Dude. Cab ride home consisted of me making out with an Asian girl sitting next to my Dad
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Randomize
