just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
She announced her abortion via fbk
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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