My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
