We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize
