Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
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