I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
Apparently I was so drunk I threw my entire wallet at the stripper on stage. That was the third time I should've gotten kicked out.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
