Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
