for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
I AM BEING ACCOSTED BY A HUMMING BIRD
I AM IN MILD DISTRESS
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
Randomize
