i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize
