I need help removing her.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Randomize
