Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I want to meet people. Preferably ones with penises
Randomize
