How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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