Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
My mom is wearing Ed Hardy. There aren't words.
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
So my ex just cheated on her current bf w/me and now there's a car coming to take me to Vegas... Is this really my Thursday night?
I hate you.
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Randomize
