I have demons in me.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I have big tits. Rules don't apply to me.
Hippo gnu deer
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize