We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Drunk walkin through police station. America
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Sorry I pissed in your dining room and kicked your best friend in the face while he was passed out.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
Randomize
