If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
So you have no knowledge as to why I am hearing loud repetitive mooing from next door?
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
Although can we find me a starter dick? I don't want security showing up again. That was awkward.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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