does your mom think i'm crazy? i just realized i played both the gay dad and the ex-jew card tonight. i blame the wine
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
He jacked off on my pillow when he found out I left. It was like coming home and finding that your dog, with separation anxiety, had pooped in your shoes. I think I'm flattered...
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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