I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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