I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
Man, I miss taking bong rips in my room. Now they are bringing dogs around so all my stuff is hidden in random places up in the woods. I literaly have to hunt and gather just to get high.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
