Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
I drank so much Goldschläger last night, I could shit a necklace.
im pretty sure every drug dealer is going to be able to retire the day after alice in wonderland comes out
Pretty sure I left lotion and my bra in your car. I've secured your fathers belief that your straight. You can thank me later
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Dont you look at me in that tone of voice
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
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