Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
I just saw a guy getting escorted with handcuffs on, I'm too drunk to be at the airport right now.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
You made noises. And kept meowing. I have a twenty minute phone call to prove it.
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
Randomize