He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Ps this homeless dude just came in hotel bar w a sword sticking out his jumpsuit trying to buy a drink w a 3rd party check
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Yelling at the starbucks lady to write Beyoncé on my cup
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
