ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize
