it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
Randomize
